Monday, September 28, 2009

Breaking Free

I've tried many times to post something on this here blog, but all the drafts have been left unfinished. Not this one though. I'm determined to complete it and hit publish.

Not everyone knows this because I didn't share it with too many people, but for much of the summer I suffered from a quite painful ailment, which precluded me from doing many things. The pain was excruciating. It would happen four to six times a day and I could do nothing but let out moans and squeeze someone or something with my hand until the pain subsided. Pain was one thing, but the worst of it was the fear of the pain. Living in constant fear of the return of when the pain would return was absolutely debilitating. Many times I would wake up from the pain and scream and clutch something until it went away, then be unable to sleep again. Of all the things I have experienced in my life, those weeks caused me the most fear ever. I stayed in my house for weeks, praying for the pain to never return again.

Spending months at home caused me to do much thinking. Thinking about the past. Thinking about the present. Thinking about the future. When the pain finally looked like it was gone for good, the relief I felt was immeasurable. It was as if I was breaking free from the physical and psychological prison that held me captive for what seemed like an eternity. The ups and downs of the last few years and the last few months have changed me forever. I feel like I once again have a renewed passion for life.

In the spirit of that passion, I've been traveling.

I visited my sister and brother-in-law in Washington. The Great Northwest is definitely a majestic place with trees everywhere. We did the touristy things like visiting the space needle, the first Starbucks, and the Public Market where the fish store workers throw fish. My favorite part though was hiking through the forests. We saw many waterfalls. At one point I said to Ate, "I can't believe that just a month ago I was lying in bed, suffering from the worst pain of my life, and now I'm standing in front of one of the highest waterfalls in the world." I definitely felt free in Washington. I could live there."

I also went to the San Jose area for my roommate Justin's wedding. A lot of fun. Hanging out with my dorm friends is always pretty crazy. They are a hilarious group. It got me truly excited for the three weddings of other friends coming up in the next year. I can't believe how fast life is going now.

After San Jose I went to the Bay Area and spent some time there. Also tons of fun. Thanks to Em, Vaughn, and Camizzle for housing me. A grand tour of Union City. Karaoke night at The Mint. Berkeley roaming. Bear's Lair revisited. All good times.

Planning for future trips is also in the works. Another trip to the Bay for a cousin's wedding. A few snow trips to break in my board and gear. A trip to the Philippines. Hopefully three or four Disneyland visits. And to end, here's the Disney song that inspired the title of this post. I will continue to be inspired, and I hope you will be too.